Thanksgiving and Christmas…my favorite time of year. But this year, a very bittersweet one. Celebrating our savior’s birth, long ago in a manger far away. While we are here with an empty crib. It’s been hard to have a happy and joyous attitude when I feel so surrounded by dark clouds of grief. We put up the Christmas tree, with lots of new ornaments of pictures of James. It should have been his first Christmas, but instead is our first Christmas without him. So many things are different. A small “J” stocking on our mantle with mine and Sierra’s. A great memory, but also a reminder of who isn’t with us.
My favorite Christmas movies don’t feel the same. Every one is “My first time watching ____ without James” It’s hard to face those emotions. Hard when everything is a reminder of being without him. I was watching the Polar Express, which is my favorite Christmas movie. Mainly because of the train, I loved trains growing up…obsessed may be been a better word. Now as an adult and watching with the perspective of what’s happened over the last few months one thing stuck out to me. The theme of the movie is believing - believing in the things we cannot see (as it applies to Santa Claus). I think this applies greatly to Faith in Jesus Christ, and the Faith we have in the hope of Heaven. I can’t see it, but I truly believe in the reality of Heaven and of our savior’s resurrection.
Another movie that has become one of my favorites in the last few years is “It’s a Wonderful Life” an old colorized film from the 1940’s. It has a great message of how important you are as a father, husband and friend. How many lives you touch in the people around you, and how many people would be different if you never existed. I hope that we can use this nonprofit to make an impact in families lives. I hope we can help families know that this isn’t the end of their story or their baby’s story. Help them know the Truth and reality of Heaven and a relationship with Jesus and lastly, a legacy for James.
Merry Christmas to all, especially my son James in Heaven. I hope you all have a great season of quality time and joy with your families. Remembering the true reason for the season - our Savior’s birth.
